I'll make it short. Tonight is tough. I always seem to fall apart, just before the finish. I've always failed in that way. Pisses me off, I can barely type this. But I have too, my last shred, hanging by a chain. One I loop for myself. It seems I'm an expert hangman, of my own neck!
It started out, a ghost swinging from that noose. Woke me straight up, a cold sweat. Crawling like insects, their tiny claws pulling my skin apart.
I haven't slept really, what's new about that. I know same old story.
I'm sitting here, a bottle of pills and old scotch. It's screaming my name. I want to take it, feel it penetrate my system, an instant shock, like I slammed my foot down on the Noss! Yeah it's insane it's familiar, how do I say no? Everything becomes so sharp. Hyper aware, screaming senses over loaded. It's like fucking without ever stopping. Pure adrenaline...
Please tell me something...I can't stop Mary...
